People Hurt

People hurt people and people have been hurt.  The path to freedom when we hurt others is different than the path to freedom when we've been hurt.  The key to a healthy life is being able to deal with both issues.  When we've hurt others, the path is easier because we've done the wrong and we can make it right.  However, when we've been hurt by others the path can become very difficult because sometimes they don't know they've hurt us, other times they refuse to acknowledge that they have hurt us, and yet there are others that have hurt us intentionally and willfully.  When we hurt others, we can repent and receive forgiveness.  When we've been hurt by others who are willing to repent, we can work through the forgiveness process. But what about those situations in which the person is unwilling to repent, will never repent, or can't repent because they are dead or mentally incapacitated?  We've been told to "forgive and forget" anyway.   But that doesn't work.  What do you think?
Dr. Leah